How should we prepare for Nikah?

:qfatima.com

2013/02/04

1667

A successful marriage, and thus a successful family and subsequently a successful community begins well before the selection of a spouse! It begins with oneself first! Educating and preparing oneself in the formative years before marriage!

Ask yourself:

Who am I?

The crucial answer to recognise first is that one is a nafs (soul) within a body. One can only have a successful union with another human being if one’s nafs and body are first attuned to each other.

In Suratul Baqara, 2:148 Allah says:

“..And everyone has a direction towards which he/she turns – so turn towards the best ...”

One must first find one’s direction – nafs and body. The emphasis on finding a spouse can not only be on superficial external elements because it will conflict with the search which each nafs isprogrammed towards to find a deeper compatibility. The marriage will not be successful if the directions are totally incompatible.