Rafed English

Private Space For Parents 

The Chapter Al-Noor in the holy Quran mainly talks about self-control of passions and desires especially sexual desires as well as fighting moral depravity and moral corruption. One of the many verses is 

O you who have believed, let those whom your right hands possess and those who have not [yet] reached puberty among you ask permission of you [before entering] at three times: before the dawn prayer and when you put aside your clothing [for rest] at noon and after the night prayer. [These are] three times of privacy for you. There is no blame upon you nor upon them beyond these [periods], for they continually circulate among you - some of you, among others. Thus does Allah make clear to you the verses; and Allah is Knowing and Wise.”(1)
Since children are yet to be obliged with Islamic duties until they reach puberty in the eyes of Islam, Allah (swt) orders parents to order their children to respect their “private space” and ask permission before entering into their parents' room during three specific times, which are the times when spouses usually “rest” and the three times are before dawn “fajr” prayer, noon when people usually used to sleep and rest(2), and after night “Isha” prayer.
The wisdom behind this discipline is that usually parents at these times are either in intercourse, or nestling or wearing their underclothing etc., which can lead to many complications and harms if children burst into the room such as:
•    Movement of sexual curiosity
•    Emotional and mental pain
•    Removal of modesty from the child 
These harms are hinted out in sayings like the saying of the Prophet (pbuh) “I swear by the one who my soul is under his power that if a man had intercourse with a woman and there was a child awake who can see and hear their words and breath then he would never be prosperous, if it was a boy he will become a man who commits adultery and if it was a girl she would become a woman who commits adultery.”(3). This is for the fact that the child who sees or hears these things will get traumatized and will suffer from psychological pain which will lead up to anger, curiosity, and even fear.
 

1.    24:58 (translated by quran.com) 
2.    The Spanish call it siesta
3.      Al-Kafi v5 p500


 

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