Rafed English

The Benefits of an Extended Family

Another point, the ninth point, can be regarded as a consequence of the extended family. We have heard about women going out to work and having a career, but for a woman to go out to work and have a career in the West, in the nuclear family, must always be and can only be done at the cost of the home and the children. Either there are no children, deliberately, in order to pursue the career or, if there are children, they are abandoned to the television set or to the baby-sitter or to the street corner if they cannot afford the baby-sitter.

Sometimes they even bum themselves or burn the house down by playing with fire without a supervisor. Or the woman comes home from work, exhausted to the point of being uninterested in the spouse or another person, and then tempers fly, because everybody is exhausted and so family life is ruined. I want to tell you that only in the Muslim family can the woman have a career outside the home. Why? Because she can absent herself, if she has a talent; if she has the talent to invent things or produce things that would benefit the whole Ummah, a woman can do that without losing either home or children. Why? Because there are so many other women in the home, because there are so many other people in the home carrying on the business of the family and so preventing damage to the career or the home.

Of course, the first career of a Muslim woman is her family. There can be no doubt about that, and that comes before driving shuttles to the moon or whatever or inventing robots. It is her duty, it is her function, it is her prime function, the function for which Allah has created her is, indeed, to be the pillar, the main pillar of the family and the mother. But this may not exhaust all her years orall her energies. And therefore, if it is possible for her to serve the Ummah additionally, besides being a mother, this could be done only in the case of the extended family and the Muslim family. And it is also the condition for the preservation of her femininity becausethe tensions under which women work outside of the home are dissipated when she comes home and the same femininity, the same feminine touch never leaves the home. This is always available.

And, in conclusion, I should remind you of all the other values that our Muslim family enjoys by virtue of adhering to the prescriptions of the Shari'ah. The fact that we do not drink alcohol or take drugs is a tremendous source of strength for the family. The fact that gambling is  Haraam and that the resources of the family ought to have one kitty in which to put their incomes and from that kitty should come all the expenses of everyone according to a system of priorities established by the responsible leader or father. All these are tremendous props which the Western peoples do not enjoy at all .

The Last Word And now a last word. We are here to stay, we are here to plant Islam in this part of the world and we must  utilise everything in our power to make the word of Allah supreme. If we go and merely talk to our   neighbours, our talk is talk and talk my brothers and sisters, does not have the convincing power of facts. Facts and deeds are far more eloquent and they tell their stories far stronger than any words, even if the words are sheer poetry. Now it is in the realm of the family that these values of Islam are exemplified. You must make it a rule to invite a non-Muslim to visit your family once a week. Devote every Friday evening to your  Da'wah effort. Invite your neighbour, whether your friend is a colleague from the factory, office, the shop where you work or your geographic neighbour next door.

Let him come in with his wife or with his girlfriend or whatever, let them come in and see for themselves these Islamic values implemented in the real life of the family. You do not have to be rich; you have to be clean, you have to be disciplined, you have to be thinking in terms of Da'wah, of putting forth these excellent values of Islam and talking about them, and not only talking about them, but practising them, and that would be your best argument. And remember that it is Allah that converts them to Islam, not you, but may you all and your poor brother, Ismail Faruqi, be instruments in the hands of Allah,  Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala, to spread His faith.

"The family Is a divinely Inspired Institution that came Into existence with the creation of man. me human race Is a product of this Institution and not the other way around."

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