Some Islamic Directives for parents - Part 1
The directives concerning education in Islam are many and the ways for reformation well defined. Here we will mention some of the most important ones and concentrate on the following directives and suggestions and beseech Allah to make our endeavors successful:
• It is advisable for parents to build a harmonious and loving relationship between them because constant disagreement or abnormal behavior on their part reflects on their children's conduct. Disrespect for each other by the husband and wife, constant nagging or quarrelling, violence, discontent and an atmosphere of gloom and hatred have negative effects upon the children’s psychology and personality which ultimately leads to bad behavior and low morals.
Therefore the parents' mutual relationship and their behaviors are of vital importance because it leaves its good or bad effects on the family as a whole, but more particularly on the children, who in turn infect the society.
• We must give our children love and kindness and teach them good manners, in order to create a harmonious family. An atmosphere of peace and security would help them to develop their personalities and guarantees their safe future. In contrast the child, who doesn’t receive any love and sympathy from its parents, will grow up to be an irresponsible misfit. Such behavior is likely to make the child abnormal, and a psychological complex, full of hatred, aimlessness and social ills.
• Adolescent or growing up children, who are becoming conscious of themselves and the environment around them should not be maltreated or ridiculed by parents. Paying scant respect to their budding personality and making them feel imperfect may lead them to disobey and dislike their own parents. To treat them harshly and deprive them of their material needs may push the adolescents toward such immoralities as lying, theft, fraud, psychological disorders and etc., thereby affecting the whole society.
• It is not proper for parents to discriminate among their own children, doting on one but neglecting the other, because the feeling of negligence will instill in the child an unconscious abhorrence for the parents, weakening family ties and ruining the child’s future.
• The isolation and aloofness of a family which severs its ties from all relatives, neighbors and society has a negative effect on the children’s lives, retarding their mental and social growth. On the other hand when children observe their parents firm ties with friends, kinsfolk, and neighbors, interspersed with exchange of visits, gifts, warm hospitality and a sincere concern for the others’ needs, it is natural for youngsters to absorb these qualities, learning good morals and etiquette.
• Parents should draw an educational and cultural program for their children, starting from early childhood even before the child enters school. They should recite Qur’anic verses and phrases like the Shahadatain' (the two testimonies) necessary for a Muslim.
They should tell morals and narrate events from the life of the Prophet, his infallible Household and pious -companions. Their glorious life full of courage, magnanimity, truth, honor, love and kindness will inspire the children and help mould their character.
• The children should be introduced to Islamic events and rites and should be explained the significance and importance of these dates. Annual events like Lailatul-Qadr (The Qadr Night in Ramadhan), start of the Prophet’s mission, The Eids, the Hajj pilgrimage and its dimensions should be properly explained.
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