What Do We Achieve from Arguments ?
Adopted from the Book : Youth and Morals
Success in social behavior directly relates to certain rules which we must learn and build our conduct upon. For man's role in his relationships with others and his knowledge of the limits of his duties are among the issues which are determinative to his/her misery or happiness.
The need for harmony and establishing relationships is a trait deeply implemented in man's nature. Everyone is inclined to love and harmony; hence resents loneliness and secluded ness. However, unless a person reaches peace of mind and soul, he will be incapable of living in peace with others, or with himself.
Peace, harmony and cooperation are essential factors for a healthy and peaceful social life; and respecting other's rights and feelings is the first conditionto be observed in the art on constructive interaction. In this case, interpersonal relationships enjoy strength and continuity. Those who lack the foresaid traits are naturally deprived of balanced relationships with others, and the basis of love and harmony are weakened in them. They cannot, under the circumstances, keep their relationships with others at an acceptable level.
One of the evil traits which severely hurts the feelings of others and destroys the ties of love between people is disputing with them. Arguing individuals should realize that excessive self-love is one of the main factors which create this evil trait; it grows only when irrigated by the flow of this treacherous instinct.
A disputatious person, in order to quench the thirst of his conceit, opposes every opinion that may be brought up in any gathering, not to present a righteous idea or eradicate a mistaken concept, but to destroy his opponent's personality by false accusations. He attempts to create a sense of false excellence for himself by doing so. Such a person might conceal his aims under exclamatory or wondering vocabulary. In this manner, the disputatious looses the spirit of a just judge, and dares to commit all kinds of oppression and encroachments upon other's rights.
Furthermore, the opponent's reaction, in this case, should not be disregarded for when an individual's pride is violated, it is inevitable that he reacts to the cause. Therefore, he may exploit the appropriate opportunity to revenge, using all his powers to do so. Thus, if this trait is widespread in any given nation, it can result in disunity in both the way of thinking and the manner of conduct.
A scholar commented on this subject by saying:
"Reason is a shinning light that guides mankind away from the darkness of ignorance and relieves him from his problems. We boast about the fact that we are the only creatures to possess reason saying that with reason we have come to understand matters, their causes, results, and their relations to other entities. Yet, woe unto us if we attempt to unveil the truth by means of discussion and argumentations; for disputing results is nothing save mental anxiety. Disputing also reveals the ignorance of the disputants and their errors in scientific fields; it never changes the way others think nor makes them adopt our ideologies."
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