Happiness and Friendship
Loneliness makes one annoyed. Man likes to be with others and communicate with them. This is an emotional need. Friendship can save man from loneliness and make him happy. The happiness of having friends occurs when one can find a friend who is similar to him or her. Imam Sadeq says that one can find his restfulness in his faithful brother. On the other hand, one should find an analogous friend for herself or himself, and she or he should keep away from bad persons as far as possible. According to Imam Ali, having little communication with such persons is the cause of keeping one's religion sound and freeing man from nearness to the rebels.
One of the factors of human happiness is having a good spouse. According to the Qur'an, "of his signs is that He created for you, of yourselves, spouses that you might repose in them, and he has set between you love and mercy. Surely in that are signs for people who consider" (Room, 30:12), and, "it is He who created you out of one living soul, and made of him his spouse that he might rest in her" (A'raf, 7:189).
Happiness in spouses is when there is friendship (love) and mercy between them. In addition, happiness is in having good children, according to the prophet of Islam. (Pasandideh, 2007, p. 203-204; 210). The word "man" or "human being" (Ensan) in Arabic is taken from "Ons," which means "affinity". Some etymologists believe that the origin of the meaning is that affluence, beauty, and affinity in the earth is possible only in the light of the existence of human beings, while other etymologists say that it is because man's life is (not) possible without affinity with others. And some say that it is because he is a manifestation of God's names and these are attuned with him. Some etymologists believe that the word is taken from the Arabic word "nissyaan," which means "forgetfulness". As the Qur'an says, "and we made covenant with Adam before, but he forgot, and we found in him no constancy" (Taha, 20:115).
It can be concluded from these facts that man should first be the cause of happiness. Second, man's happiness is obtained through being with other human beings and through his being with God; forgetting God causes grief in him.
The Qur'an says regarding some (bad) people, "you think of them as a host; but their hearts are scattered" (Hashr, 59:14). And Imam Ali says in this regard,
"You are brethren in the religion of God. Dirty nature and bad conscience have separated you. Consequently, you do not bear burdens of each other nor advise each other. What is your condition? You feel satisfied with what little you have secured from this world while much of the next world of which you have been deprived does not grieve you. The little of this world, which you lose, pains you so much so that it becomes apparent in your faces, and in the lack of your endurance over whatever is taken away from you" (sermon 113).
One of the reasons behind this is egoism, while affection causes the selfishness to be removed. According to Imam Ja'far Sadeq, the reason for affection towards others is the selection of and preferring the beloved to others. According to the prophet of Islam, God is the friend of the one who loves him. According to him, the happiest people are those who have relations with good and great individuals. Imam Ali orders us to be with scholars so that we may achieve happiness (Tayyebi & Moeenoleslam, 2004, p. 146-147). The prophet of Islam believes that visiting religious brothers causes happiness (Akbari, 2006, p. 47).
Adapted from the book: "Foundations of Happiness"
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