Obedience based on Love

We must remember that a rule, based on tyranny or injustice, can never be stable. Therefore, the foundation of the husband's authority has been laid not on fear or awe, but on love. Allah says:

And among His signs is this that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between you. Verily, in that are signs for those who reflect. (Qur'an, 30:21)

In this ayah, two words, `love' and `mercy', have been used for the matrimonial love. It points to the subtle difference between the love of woman and man. Woman, generally speaking, loves her husband more intensely. She gives her soul and body to the husband. The word, "love" describes this aspect.

On the other hand, husband's love to his wife is tinted with the natural superiority - there is no "giving up his self" to the wife. Hence the word "mercy". Anyhow, this love and obedience are the prelude to fulfil the two important duties mentioned earlier: Management of domestic affairs, and procreation.

Adopted from the book: "The Family Life of Islam" by: "Sayyid Saeed Akhtar Rizivi"