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Family Life

Observance of The Right and The Obligations

Islamic system has stipulated Rights and Obligations for the spouses and observing it has a surety of spreading constancy and tranquility in the family's atmosphere. Then the restriction from both spouses with stipulated Rights and obligations will contributes to the deepening their periods, strengthening their peaceful relationship and refutes all kinds of probable tensions and enmity which have negative impacts on the role of the equilibral emotional feelings of the child.

Guardianship is the most important Right of the male spouse, Allah the most High said: {Men are in charge of women, because Allah has made some of them to excel others, and because they spend out of their property (for the support of women).} 14.

Then it is compulsory to the wife to observe this Right because family will not move without guardianship. Men's guardianship is the appropriate for the natural differences in body and emotional feelings of both spouses. She needs to observe this guardianship in her dealings with the children and to made them feel the position of their father.

The next important Right after guardianship is the assertion in the sayings of the Prophet (peace be upon him and his descendants) while answering question of a woman that asked about the Right of husband over the women and he (peace be upon him and his descendants) said : "to obeyed him and not to disobeyed him, don't be on voluntary fasting without his consent, don't prevent him of herself even though she is at the back of camel and don't go out of his house except his permission" 15.

Among the right of the male spouse the Prophet (peace be upon him and his descendants) said:" Right of the male spouse on the women is to switch on the lamp, to prepare the meals, to welcome and receive him at the door of her house, to provide him with wash basin and handkerchief, to purify him and not to prevent him of herself except any reason" 16

For the important of observing this Right the Prophet (peace be upon him and his descendants) said: "Women has not fulfill the Right of Allah until she has fulfill the Right of her husband" 17.

Islamic system has also laid down the Right of the wife that is compulsory to the husband to observe.

On authority of Imam Jaafar bn Mohammad Assadiq (peace be upon him) why answering the question of Ishaq bn Ammar regards the Right of women on her husband, he (peace be upon him) said: "He should satisfies her stomach, to shroud her dead body and forgives her ignorance" 18

The holy Prophet (peace be upon him and his descendants) answered a question asked by khulat bint Al Aswad regards the Rights of women, he (peace be upon him and his descendant) said: "to feed you with what he eats is your Right on him, to clothes you with what he wears with, not to slap you and not to shout on you" 19.

Among her right is for the husband to honor her and his good companionship with her. The Commander of the Faithful (peace be upon him) in his Will to Mohammad bn Hanafiyah said: "Verily women is a sweet basin, she is not a house keeper, then revolve her in all condition, and make good companionship with her to purify your livings" 20.

Among the Right of the wife and the rest members of the families is to satisfy their material needs. The holy Prophet (peace be upon him and his descendants) said:

"Who struggles for his families, is like those that fight the holy war (Jihad) for the sake of Allah" 21.

He (peace be upon him and his descendants) said: "Woe on to those that forfeit his families" 22.

He (peace be upon him and his descendants) said : "The women's Right on her husband is to obstruct her hunger, to cover her nakedness and not to distort her presence, by Allah if the husband does that he has observed her Right" 23.

Compliance to the Right of the male spouse by the wife and that of the female spouse by the husband is compulsory as it leads to constancy of the family's atmosphere, the positive reaction will made the both spouses to work towards the bless of the family and that of the children. Constancy of the women during pregnancy stage, breast feeding and the early infancy has effect on the baby's constancy and his tranquility. Moving towards the light of that premeditated from advices, guidance and orientation will originate personal independence in the child in terms of his thought, emotional feelings and his ways of life.

Notes:

14 - Qur'an 4:34.

15 - Manla yahdurhu faqeeh vol-3:277/1st ch- Men's Right on women.

16 - Makaarimul Akh'laq: 215.

17 - Makaarimul Akh'laq: 215.

18 - Manla yahdurhul faqeeh vol-3:279/ 2nd ch- men's right on women.

19 - Makaarimul Akh'laq: 218.

20 - Makaarimul Akh'laq: 218.

21 - Uddatu Ddaayi: 72 - by Ahmad bn Fahd Al-hilli - printed by maktabatul wijdaani Qom.

22 - Uddatu Ddaayi: 72 - by Ahmad bn Fahd Al-hilli - printed by maktabatul wijdaani Qom.

23 - Uddatu Ddaayi: 81 - by Ahmad bn Fahd Al-hilli - printed by maktabatul wijdaani Qom.

Adapted from the book: "The Child's Education in Islam" by: "Ismail Abdullah"